The Conservative Environmental Plan

Call me naive if you like, but I was really hoping to be surprised by the Conservatives this time around. Here we are at a crucial moment in the Planet's history and Stephen Harper stands at the helm of one of the worst polluting countries in the world. But instead of doing the Right Thing, the Conservatives have opted to abandon Kyoto and persue a plan that will do nothing but kill more trees for the paper it's printed on.

The short version of the plan in plain English:

We will do nothing until we consult with industry and discuss what needs to be done. We don't care that this has already been done over the last twenty years, we want to look like we're doing something.

We will put intensity limits on carbon production but will do nothing to curb the overall number of carbon producers so carbon output can only increase.

But most importantly, we will join the Americans in working out of step with the rest of the world, thereby ensuring the failure of the Kyoto Protocol.

Sadly, the minute Canada pulled out of Kyoto, any plan the Conservatives had in mind was automatically an abysmal failure. We can't beat global warming alone. It will take honest commitments from all nations and there's no way to ensure that by backing out of the simplest of international agreements.

Never before have I been more ashamed to be Canadian. On behalf of my country, I apologise to everyone who has a stake in the survival of our species. We have failed you. We have failed ourselves.